Spanksgiving

About this event

We come together full of food, full of family, and full of friends. In this moment, life is deliciously abundant. We’ll express the profundity of our appreciation for one another, for our beloved community, by feasting in the pleasures of the flesh. Every kind of sensation will be on the menu – which ones will you ask for, dear one, and which will you skillfully and consensually serve up?

This gathering is about gratitude. It's about a celebration of our beautiful bodies and bright spirits.

Let us give spanks.

SPANKSGIVING will take place Friday, November 25, 2022 at 7pm.

Remember, tickets are only available to active Bonobo Network members (i.e., you've paid for a membership or made other arrangements) and who have completed the Bonobo Network orientation course on our community platform. If you're somehow seeing this ticketing page without having done one of these steps, email info@bonobonetwork.com for information on how to proceed.

NEW POLICY: Vaccination cards will be checked at the door instead of pre-verified.

»»» Details

Doors open at 7:00pm for workshop, opening circle at 9:00pm.

No entry after 9:00pm without permission from hosts. (Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.)

Important! If you're purchasing more than one ticket, please make sure each individual attending is named! This event is for Bonobo members only. You're not permitted to purchase a ticket for anyone who hasn't become a member.

»»» Entertainment

Workshop:

7-8pm TBA

Music by:

Fair Play

Dao ~ www.soundcloud.com/djdao

Piotron ~ soundcloud.com/piotron

And more to come

»»» Registration + Tickets

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/spanksgiving-tickets-468889018677

pw: givespanks

Tickets will be on a sliding scale from $55 - $85 for PrimeMates, our premium members.

Tickets for our standard members will be on a sliding scale starting at $65.

Please contribute at the level that best reflects what you can afford. That helps us maintain our generous No One Turned Away For Lack Of Funds policy.

NEED DISCOUNT? If you need a discount due to financial hardship, we invite you to use promo codes NOTAFLOF25 for a 25% discount, NOTAFLOF50 for a 50% discount, or NOTAFLOF75 for a 75% discount. If you need a complimentary ticket, please email info@bonobonetwork.com to make a request.

Who should use the NOTAFLOF policy? Examples are those who are supporting children or other dependents alone, have significant debt, have medical expenses not covered by insurance, receive public assistance, have immigration-related expenses, are an elder with limited financial support, are an unpaid community organizer.

»»» Volunteering

Volunteering is a great way to meet other Bonobos, and volunteer tickets have discounts baked into them as a thank you for your contribution. Available roles include:

Setup (Saturday 5pm - 7pm Pre-party) [$30 ticket]

Greeting (2 hour shifts before and during party) [$40 ticket]

Covid testing (2 hour shifts before and during party) [$40 ticket]

Angels (60 minute shifts during party) [$40 ticket]

Cleaning (60 minute shifts during party) [$40 ticket]

Strike (Sunday 11am - 1pm Post-Party) [$20 ticket]

»»» Inviting your friends

Want to invite a friend to this or future parties? Great! They'll need to become a member. Invite them to apply at https://www.bonobonetwork.com

If you know someone really well, you can let us know that by endorsing their application. The standard for endorsement is high, as is the bar for membership. Your friends should FULLY understand Bonobo Network's culture, especially around consent.

• They should be broadly familiar with their boundaries and be able to set boundaries with others.
• They should be able to resolve conflicts gracefully, generously, and empathetically.
• Ideally, you trust them implicitly, and you would either play with them yourself or recommend that your friends play with them at the party.
• You would feel comfortable staking your reputation on their being a good fit for our community. (NOTE: This is different from feeling confident that they would enjoy themselves or get something out of the experience.)

»»» Incident Reporting

If your boundaries are crossed at the party, if a Bonobo member acts in ways that are not in accordance with our culture and values, or even if someone just creeps you out, please report the incident to an angel or party host. We also encourage you to file an incident report online at http://bit.ly/bonoboincidentreport.

Incident reports aren't just for consent violations at Bonobo events. If people are behaving in the ways described above outside of parties, it can be helpful for us to know.

»»» Bonobo Network Principles

What began as a series of small parties in Summer 2010 has grown into a community that has served 3,000 people around the Bay Area and the world. Our community is united by the following principles, which inform how we orient towards the spaces we share and how we treat one another:

High Possibility, Low Expectation: Our communities are best when they're treated as high possibility, low expectation spaces. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome sexy interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact with you in any particular way. No one owes you anything. Second, we often attend these events with an expectation of the type or quality of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connection of all kinds available to you at the party. Low expectation DOES NOT mean "low desire" – we believe it's helpful to have a well-explored and articulated sense of what you want and to hold those desires lightly.

Trust and Integrity: Parties like ours are built on trust – that's what allows us to be as open and welcoming and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces. But this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to be our most trustworthy. Three important implications of this : keep the identities of folks at our events confidential, proactively disclose relevant safer sex risks, and take exquisite care of the venues, spaces, and neighborhood ecosystems that host us.

Consent: We agree that we will only physically engage with one another, including nonsexual touch, where there is CLEAR CONSENT. We define consent as an ongoing collaboration between two or more people in constant verbal, physical, and emotional dialogue about what each other needs to safely, willingly, and pleasurably interact with one another. Gold standard consent in Bonobo Network is affirmative, informed, unpressured, specific, competently given, and ongoing. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust -- it's also about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their yes. Please read our Consent and Accountability Policy (https://bit.ly/bonoboconsentpolicy) for more details on how we approach consent and accountability.

High Challenge, High Support: Play parties can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. We’re committed to making the play parties we throw high challenge, high support environments. We come together to celebrate and play at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, we provide a dedicated nonsexual space at each party for folks who need to get away from the intensity of the gathering. It means recruiting a team of angels who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the party. And it means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being an angel for everyone around them.

Here's a guide to have a pre-party conversation with your sweetie(s) to make your party go smoothly for both of you: https://bit.ly/beingpartyready

Everyone Contributes: Parties like this are never the work of a single organizer -- it takes the participation and contribution of a host of people. Everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party: money, time, energy, enthusiasm, work, intention, example, concern and/or awareness.

Inclusion: We are dedicated to fostering inclusion in our community. No matter your race, ethnicity, gender identity, or class background, we want everyone who participates in this community to understand that they belong here, and that they have as much of a stake in what happens here as anyone else does. While we recognize that everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to learning how to foster such an atmosphere, we also commit to a stance of learning -- and supporting one another's learning -- of how to be excellent to one another.

This is a dynamic list, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. Thanks to you all for playing mad scientist with us.